Findings growing up

As we grow older, we do not necessarily become wiser. We still make mistakes, sometimes we even make the same mistakes over and over. We might even find ourselves over and over again in the same situations. Because the situations we are familiar with is ‘comfortable’. Inverted commas because in fact it may not be comfortable at all, but that what we already know what it’s like is something we are most likely to fall back into. Even if those situations aren’t situations of love, or experiencing them with positive persons.

The thing is, what you are familiar with is what you got used to. I’m not going to say it is normal, because it is not. I’m not going to say either that it is abnormal, because it is not like that either. You can compare this to an addiction, or a nicer way to put it, would be a lifestyle. For example, an athlete who would rather spend all of his time in the gym, than spending times with his friends. I know this is an extreme example. All I’m trying to make you aware of is that what you got used to doing, develops into some kind of habit. The same goes for smoking.

As a result of that, you might wake up some day and you can not imagine what your life would look like, if your life would look any different. Below you’ll find a few examples to make what I’m talking about more clear. Maybe you’ll see that some apply to you, others may not…

– You are used to people walking all over you. You do not want problems with other persons, or you think you don’t matter enough. So if someone talks bad to you or about you, you just say nothing back, you let them be and you don’t fight back. I got news for you, you matter in any version of you. Do you like people to treat you bad? Bet you don’t. Bet you have thought of how good it would feel if you would say something. If you would stand up for yourself. Sure, you should not be spending too much of your time on them, such people are not worth it. But you should never let people treat like you don’t matter.

– Or you find yourself being in a relationship where all the love ran out. You aren’t really in love anymore. The connection that once was there, isn’t there anymore. You stay knowing things are not going to change between the two of you. On the other side, that other person knows everything there is to know about you and in a way that sets your mind at rest. That person knows you and you do like that. The fact that this persons knows absolutely everything about you and decides to stick with you. You still like this person, but you just are not in love anymore. You choose to stay because it is familiar, it is easy, you are used to it and you are probabloy too afraid to find out what it would be like to feel that crazy in love thing all over again, opening yourself up to be vulnerable. And you do not want to hurt the person you are with. But by staying in a relationship, that has no future whatsoever anymore, are you not really hurting yourself?

– Perhaps fear has become such a big part in your life, that fear has taken over your life. You are too afraid to see what’s out there. You are too afraid to be in a situation you don’t know, even if that situation could increase your hapiness. You choose to decide to stick with the familiar. But the familiar is not always good. And if you know that it can be better, why not try?

Point being: your happiness is at stake.

xo Sophia

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Sophia Streefkerk

Hi, I'm 22 years old and a secondyears-student of the education International Business Studies. Main interests in business, life and fashion, but also travel en design.

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